Loving One Another

Posts tagged ‘self-confidence’

Realizing Limitations


“I don’t understand why people can’t admit their faults; if I had any, I sure would!” I love that quote. It’s all about the log in my eye while I’m pointing out the sliver in someone else’s eye. That log gets in the way of my clear vision. It prevents me from realizing my own limitations.

Limitations? Do  I  have limitations? One of my favorite scriptures is, “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” ALL things? Jump tall buildings in a single bound? End war forever? Cure cancer? Well, those are limitations that are easily recognized and admitted. What realistically do I see and acknowledge? What are the slivers in my eye? Do others see the speck that I choose to ignore?

The ophthalmologist calls those specks “floaters.” They are shadows caused by the floating cell particles at the back of my retina. Too remote to be seen without the use of high-powered instruments  –  or ever-discerning, fault-finding friends. Those friends are treasures! They care. They take the time to really observe. Most people don’t, you know. We’d all worry less about our faults and who sees them if we realized how few people care enough to really LOOK at us that closely! YOU are the one who holds the mirror, stands in front of it, and stares.

Limitations? Sometimes the most obvious ones are the ones we actually DO see – – – and we may be the only one who does. After all, who cares more about you than you do? Do all faults have to be limitations?

Go ahead – – – scale that tall building! Find a cure for cancer! Someone will someday, you know. Might as well be you!

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I Did My Best


Thank you, GinaV, for this “adorable” reminder of how we measure our success most effectively:

http://professionsforpeace.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/i-did-my-best-smiling-ribbon-award-n13857_xl.jpg

When you posted it on your blog at http://professionsforpeace.com/2012/05/26/ongoing-learning-from-awards/, you created a caption. It said, “No I am not starting a new Award, but if I was I’d choose this great image!” You listed the source as Scholars Choice. Thank you for posting it and acknowledging the source. I love this adorable image – and am inspired by it to share my experience with this “Do Your Best” concept.

As an educator (K-6) in the classroom for more than two decades and as an administrator (K-adult) for a dozen or more years, I had the opportunity to experience first-hand how the expectations of others affects our self-evaluations, our self-esteem. How do we know when we have done our best? Who helps us determine what our best is?

I learned from a wise educator (Madeline Hunter) in an in-service once upon a time eons ago that the question is not, “Are you smart?” The question is, “How are you smart?” What a difference that makes! As teachers, coaches, mentors, parents, friends, our task is to look for the natural strengths in others (as well as in ourselves). We all have them. Dig! Build on successes. Learn from, but do not emphasize, failures. Rewaprd achievement.

My favorite expression when I was counseling teachers was one with poor grammar, but with great truth: “What you pay attention to is what you get more of.” Want success? Find the best effort and praise it! Find what the person does best and teach through that strength.

When I met her, Mary Jane was an illiterate adult. She was nearly 40 and she had spent the last 30 years avoiding the world of print. Her “best” was sorting clothes from the dressing rooms at JC Penney and putting them back on the proper racks. No words needed for that task. But she hated being unable to read. She hid it well, but it made her feel “less than.” You can imagine! She enrolled in the adult literacy program and I had the privilege of working with her to unlock the world of print. Sorting letters was a lot like sorting clothes. Matching capital to small case letters, sounds to letters, classifying vowels and consonants. One step at a time, backing up to the beginning, building on her strengths, we did it!! Have you ever watched the light glow in an adult’s eyes when the star illuminates and the heavens open? “I did my best” took on a whole new meaning!

When we are asked to perform at a level above our capabilities, frustration abounds. Maybe we WOULD be capable of that performance, but somebody needs to care enough to show us how. With love and patience, and confidence in our ability to catch on, somebody needs to break it down. Step by step, lead us through the process of knowing how, trusting that we CAN. We sense it when somebody teaches us that way. They believe in us. We begin to believe in ourselves. What a thrill!

Everyday is a new opportunity to DO MY BEST. What will I tackle with confidence today? Together, we can do it!

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